Tuesday, October 12, 2010

ANTM 5

More liveblogging. Sorta. I got a little behind this week, so just bear with me. 

Last Week: Reminder that Kacey is not well liked in the house, Matthew Ralston's weird-ass photo shoot and ... a dig at Rhianna? Seriously, what did that mean? "And like another Rhianna, our Rhianna proved to be one-note." HUH?

Anne is getting hated on because she keeps getting called first. But so is Kacey and she tries to ... do something about that ... by calling everyone's attention and running her mouth. Greatest moment of my life? When Chris (you can't see her, but it's her) boos her and yells: "Get off the stage, bitch!" Though, I have to admit, Kacey's plan (write down a question and I'll answer it) isn't too shabby.
In other news, Liz is still super fucking annoying.
Haha, yeah, it sounds like Jane said her dad is a "lawn doctor" (she means lung doctor, and really, is that a thing?), just like Rich over at fourfour said. Lulz. I like Jane enough, she's quiet, takes decent photos and doesn't make my eyes hurt when I look at her. But I knew very little of her before this episode. Turns out, she comes from a well-to-do family and Liz decides to get passive-aggressive about it. Barf.

Lexie reminds us that she is "really strange." Which means she's actually just really annoying.

At the 2nd Street tunnel in Downtown LA the girls are introduced to their next runway challenge by Ms. J. I have no fucking idea what's going on with her eyebrows. There are male models again and Kacey brings up how difficult it is for her to not flirt with that same model as last time. What an asshole. I always managed to not flirt with cute guys when I had a boyfriend. Jesus.
Oh yeah, the runway is actually a conveyor belt. LOL
OK, OK. Fine. The male models are cute...

The challenge is a total disaster, of course. Liz is such a complete fucking spaz! Jane's knees are incredibly red. Oh Kendal ... Lexie seems to be the only one who can handle the runway with out looking like a total nut. Kacey wins the challenge and screams like a mother fucker.

ALT shows up with a model that I have heard of but am not familiar with. She makes them a fruit smoothie because they all eat a bunch of shit - especially Anne. EW. Lexie leaves bobbi pins on the kitchen counter. And Kacey has old ass food on the counter. EW! They argue and scream and it's annoying and Liz agrees so she yells in Kacey's face. Anyone else get the feeling that Kacey is going to get called first this episode?

The girls show up at a Lucha Libre ... thing. Plus, a father-son photography team is going to shoot the girls. They look a lot alike and it's freaking me out. They are also annoying - constantly yelling and making monkey noises.
Liz has some trouble with taking direction and listening to Mr. Jay. Jane looks great but basically can't commit to a pose. Esther went a little nuts - and I like it. Chelsey reminds me of Blonde Ambition-ers Madonna. Kayla talks about being a lesbian - again; I love it too, but let's not make a "thing" out of it. Chris gets physical! Anne isn't doing too well and it freaks her out - this makes me sad. Lexie looks so god damned trashy.

Back at the house the girls enjoy some food and I notice that there is a shelf almost totally filled with Pepridge Farm cookies. Didn't they just have a conversation about this?

Lots of fake laughter in the backstage, pre-panel camera-thingy.

Kendal looks great in person. Her photo is only OK because her face looks good but her body is "meh."
Lexie has a terrible photo. Just ... terrible.
Esther has some fun body language but a bland face.
Chelsey looks like Marilyn Manson in her photo.
Anne admits that she didn't do well but it turns out that she did a great job. And it's true!
Jane has a cute looking picture but it's very unimaginative and a little porn-y.
Chris is FIERCE! Except in the face.
Kayla's outfit is crazy. Her photo is dynamic though.
Liz is also dressed to unimpress. Her photo is nuts.
Kacey looks a little messy. But she's kinda vacant and "safe."

Called first? Anne. Again. She's going to be murdered in her sleep. Tyra goads Chris into getting pissy at Anne, but for the moment she's too excited about being called second.

Thunderdome Battle!
It's Lexie vs. Jane! Both a beautiful (maybe) but Lexie can't take a picture to save her life. Jane is a little lacking in the personality department but it's cool because she's staying. Bye Lexie! Thanks for the good times, you were just a little too boring.

Next Week: Anne doesn't do well at a Cover Girl shoot and the girls have a photo shoot on Rodeo Drive. Then my DVR cuts off the episode.

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